MSS #059: 7 Ways of Thinking That Can Trip Us Up and How to Untangle This; No.1

MSS #059: 7 Ways of Thinking That Can Trip Us Up and How to Untangle This; No.1

MSS #059: 7 Ways of Thinking That Can Trip Us Up and How to Untangle This; No.1

24 Feb, 2024

Read time: 4.4 minutes

In a rush? This week there is no real shortcut, you need to read it all. You could just jump to the quotes and read them in 1 minute!

90-95% of what we do is habitual.

Habits work in a way that is almost invisible, without emotion. It’s our brains way of getting lots done with fast acting, how to routines that get triggered all the time.

When useful habits, that’s great. Some are not, but as they act silently it can be a mystery as to how we managed to get ourselves in a mental pickle, again!

Way back I sat down and analysed this and came up with 7 types of thinking, that causes most of our mental upset, assuming your learnt habitual response is not helpful!

I run workshops just on this topic, of the 7 ways of thinking that trip us up.

In this week’s newsletter, as a way of saying thankyou to you, I will briefly share the first of these 7 ways of thinking and how you can change your mental response – ready?

No. 1 Thoughts - Everything you ever did, or will do, started with a thought, make more of them good ones.

I go into a lot more detail in my workshops, but here’s the heart of the concept.

Nothing happens without a thought. We either act or don’t act following a thought. And how we act or idle, is determined by that thought.

Those thoughts can either hold us back and tie us up in knots (knot image on the left) or propel us forward and energise us (rocket ship image).

Most of this process happens so fast and “silently” as our pre-programmed habitual response to situations kicks in.

Let’s then take one step back. Where we place our attention determines the type of thoughts we have.

So, by being more aware of where we place our attention, we influence our thoughts and thinking and the outcome.

Now I have started some awareness of this, you will start noticing this (courtesy of our Reticular Activating System – I write a lot about this, see 28^th Oct 23 newsletter MSS# 042 How to program your mind's Sat Nav)

A framework helps, to start noticing more about where you place your attention and the choices you have over this.

The simplest model is,

1) Be aware if the thought is positive or negative?

2) Does your thinking take place more in the present moment, or is it stuck in the past or future?

3) How much of your thinking is about happy things or goals you want to achieve?

What’s a positive thought?

Is it….

· Optimistic as opposed to pessimistic?

· Is it kind and nurturing?

· Does it reflect gratitude?

· Does it give you energy?

Are you in the present moment?

Our minds can drift of to thinking about the past or future – they are not real places. Courtesy of the way the older parts of our brain works, this simulator in our heads, makes it feal real. If you are enjoying happy, fun thoughts in the past – brilliant.

If you are reliving painful discussions past moments or dreading an upcoming conversation – get your head back to now! The subject of my 5^th way of thinking can trip us up.

Now what?

So far, we have awareness, that where we place our attention, influences the thoughts we have.

The thoughts we have direct the actions and inaction we have.

We have a framework to choose where we place our attention,

• Positive OR in the present moment OR future goal and future fun.

Now we need to embed the new direction of our attention and therefore thoughts as a habit!

This framework is what I call ACE:

• Awareness: of where we place our attention.

• Choice: actively choosing where we place our attention.

• Embedding: our choice of where we place our attention, as our new habit.

Embedding

In my workshops I go into more detail, but here are a few ways of creating a new habit for where we place our attention.

Practical Strategies to Embed,

1. Use Quotes as Anchors: Inspirational quotes can act as anchors, reminding us of our chosen path. For instance, “Change your thoughts and you change your world” - Vincent Peale.

Quotes act as a reminder to think a different way, choose a quote that creates an image and emotion for you.

2. Nudges: Nudges start with a simple word or phrases that redirect your thoughts.

Choose a word or phrase, that means something to you. That you can readily create an image and associated emotion that redirects your thinking to your chosen path.

A simple example is

Positive or +VE – I say this in my mind as a trigger to think of positive thoughts. I then imagine a car battery, focusing on the +ve terminal and this positivity giving me energy (emotion).

This acts as a reminding to send my thoughts to positive, supportive thoughts.

3. I Choose Statements: This is so simple, I say to myself “I choose….” followed by a word that sets the direction of my thoughts.

Here are some simple examples,

 I choose happy.

 I choose to choose.

 I choose my goals.

 I choose NOW.

As with the nudges, marry this with an image and emotion that supports this phrase.

You can also use affirmations, they work and there is a science to how you construct these, but I tend not to use these.

If you are wondering about my obsession with an image and an emotion, this is because this is the way the ancient part of our brain processes “instructions”. The ancient part of our brain, is where our fear and fight and flight systems operate. It is also where irrational thinking takes place and our habits reside.

Habits operate much faster than the thinking in the rational part of the brain, that mainly uses words to process “requests.”

Useful quotes

Here are some quotes you might find useful for this first thinking style that can trip us up.

“Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see a shadow.” - Helen Keller

“Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.” – Winston Churchill

“If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.” – Milton Berle

“There are always flowers for those who want to see them.” – Henry Matisse

“Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you’ll start having positive results.” - Willie Nelson

“We become what we think about.” - Earl Nightingale

“Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” - Napoleon Hill

“Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same.” - Francesca Reigler

Other positivity tools

We have not got time today to share the science behind these, but these techniques make a permanent difference to your brain’s response to stress, when you practice them daily. Give one a try.

Gratitude journal – everyday make 3 to 5 entries in a dedicated book at the same time.

Gratitude list – keep a running list of things you are grateful for.

Mental gratitude tally – make a mental list of eight or so things I am grateful for. (Image + Emotion)

Thank you - say thank you more often outload to others or in your head.

Write a thank you note – in the world of electronic communication, personally written notes are well appreciated by those who receive them, which gives you as the writer a nice boost as well.

Summary

Remember, the journey to mastering your mind begins with understanding your thoughts.

Use my ACE technique to become more aware of your thought patterns, make empowering choices, and embed these new responses into your life.

See you next week for more insights. Don't forget to follow me on LinkedIn for daily posts and tips!

All ideas and concepts copyright Matt Sturgess mindlocksmith

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That's it for this week. Thanks for reading, really hope this helped. Contact me if you think I can help you further at [email protected].

Happy thinking.