MSS #0151: Don’t Shrink Your Shine – Own Your Wins the Right Way

MSS #0151: Don’t Shrink Your Shine – Own Your Wins the Right Way

29 Nov, 2025

🕒Read time: 3.1 minutes
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How often have you heard someone do something incredible, only to brush it off with:
“It was nothing”
“Just doing my job”
“Oh, anyone could have done that”

Maybe it’s you who says these things.

Today we’ll explore why we do this, what it costs us (and those around us) and how a small shift in how we respond can transform our mindset, our influence, and our team culture.

The Disappearing Act – Why We Downplay Success

Dismissing achievement is more common than you’d think.

At first glance, it can look like humility.

But let’s dig deeper.

Here’s why we often minimise our own accomplishments:

• Fear of appearing arrogant – We’ve been conditioned to avoid being “full of ourselves”.

• Imposter syndrome – We quietly believe we didn’t really deserve the success.

• Cultural norms – Some cultures or teams value modesty so highly that anything else feels taboo.

• Habit – It’s just what we’ve always done.

And the go-to phrases?
You’ll recognise many of these:

• “It wasn’t a big deal.”
• “Just lucky, I guess.”
• “Only possible because of others.”
• “It’s not worth making a fuss about.”
• “Honestly, anyone could have done it.”

But behind these automatic responses lie some serious consequences.

The Hidden Cost of Shrinking

When we brush away recognition, we think we’re being humble.

In reality, we’re teaching our brain – and our team – that effort and excellence don’t matter.

Here’s what happens over time:

• Our self-worth suffers. We train our mind not to value our contributions.

• We lose motivation. If effort doesn’t get acknowledged, what’s the point in trying?

• Others feel unseen too. Team members may mirror our deflection behaviour, leading to a culture of underappreciation.

• We model disconnection. Brushing off praise subtly says, “Achievements are awkward, let’s not talk about them.”

And that’s not what we want.

We want to build a culture of healthy pride, mutual recognition, and real confidence.

So how do we do that, without falling into arrogance or self-importance?

OWN IT – A Simple Process

This 4-step process offers an alternative to automatic dismissal.

It rewires how we respond to achievement – both our own and others’.

Think of it as the antidote to “it was nothing”.

Use the mnemonic: OWN IT

1. O – Own the effort
Say something that acknowledges the time, energy or dedication it took.
E.g. “Thank you. I worked hard on that project, so I appreciate you noticing.”

2. W – Welcome the praise
Let it in. Just say thank you. No jokes. No deflection. Just receive.
E.g. “That means a lot – thank you.”

3. N – Name the learning
Share something you grew from or found fulfilling.
E.g. “It really stretched me, but I learnt so much about working under pressure.”

4. IT – Inspire the team
Use your experience to lift others.
E.g. “If I can do it, so can you – let me know if you want help with your own version.”

A Healthier Way to Shine

This isn’t about bragging.

It’s about respecting your growth, making your mind stronger and showing others what’s possible.

Every time you say, “It was nothing” you rob yourself and others of the opportunity to value effort, resilience and progress.

By saying, “Thank you, it meant a lot”, you open the door to more confidence, connection and collective momentum.

Small change. Big impact.

Summary

When you diminish your achievements, you diminish more than just a moment – you shrink your confidence, your culture and your team.

Use OWN IT to rewire how you show up when things go right.

Bullet Summary:

• Downplaying success often stems from fear, habit or imposter syndrome.
• Phrases like “It was nothing” send the wrong message to your brain and team.
• Regular deflection affects motivation, recognition and team culture.
• Use the OWN IT mnemonic to build healthier, more inspiring responses.
• Own your wins – not with arrogance, but with honesty, warmth and pride.

See you next week. One more thought 👇

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That's it for this week. Thanks for reading, really hope this helped. Contact me if you think I can help you further at [email protected].

Happy thinking.