MSS #0128: Emotional Fatigue – How to Refuel When You’re Emotionally Drained

MSS #0128: Emotional Fatigue – How to Refuel When You’re Emotionally Drained

📅21 June, 2025

🕒Read time: 2.7 minutes
🚀 In a hurry? Jump to “The Emotional Battery Model” for a reduced reading time of 1.4 minutes.

You’re not being lazy.

Some days, you’re not physically tired — you’re emotionally drained.

In this Saturday Solace, we explore emotional fatigue: what causes it, how it quietly builds up and most importantly, how to recharge before it becomes burnout.

When Energy Disappears Without a Reason

Emotional fatigue is a slow leak — not a blowout.

You often don’t notice it building.

You just wake up one day and feel… flat.

Here’s how it often shows up:

• Everyday tasks feel heavier than usual

• You struggle to care about things you normally enjoy

• You avoid calls or messages because “it’s too much”

• You feel like there’s no space left in your mind

• Your fuse is shorter, your patience thinner

Unlike physical exhaustion, sleep alone doesn’t fix emotional depletion.

You need emotional refueling.

What Causes Emotional Fatigue?

It builds over time, usually from:

• Trying to control an event / situation outside your control

• Constant caregiving or emotional support to others

• Suppressing your own feelings to stay “strong”

• Navigating high-pressure work environments

• Never switching off

• Decision overload

• People-pleasing

Your emotional energy is a resource.

And like any resource, it needs replenishing.

Often you will not notice this yourself as it often relates to a characteristic that is deeply you, perhaps helping others.

As you get more depleted, each small drop is less noticeable, but the cumulative impact over time is significant.

It’s often easier for a trusted family member or friend to notice it and call it out, most likely you will be in denial though.

The Emotional Battery Model

(Start here for a 1.4-minute read time)

Visualise your emotional energy as a battery.

Every interaction, task, or thought either charges, drains, or protects that battery.

Some activities, events or situations drain your emotions much quicker than others, you will know what these are for you.

Here’s how to take control of it:

1. Deplete – What’s Draining You?

Begin by spotting the leaks.

Common emotional drains:

• Internal pressure to be perfect
• Being constantly available to others
• Difficult or unresolved relationships
• Excessive screen time without breaks
• Taking on others’ emotions (empath overload)

Track your day and notice what leaves you mentally or emotionally heavier.

✅ Tool: Keep a “drain log” for 3 days – jot down what drains your mood or motivation, even subtly.

Awareness creates power.

2. Disrupt – Make One Change

You don’t need a full life overhaul.

Start by adjusting one regular drain.

Here are realistic disruptions:

• Say no to one invitation this week

• Mute WhatsApp for 2 hours after work

• Add a 5-minute transition break between meetings

• Step away from your desk at lunch — even for 5 minutes

• Block time in your calendar for no reason other than recovery

These aren’t indulgences.

They’re fuel stops.

Build a series of stack habit changes.

3. Deposit – Add Back What Lifts You

Now, schedule your emotional deposits.

These are activities or experiences that give you energy, lift your mood or reconnect you to yourself.

Deposits can be:

• Reading fiction to escape

• Playing with a pet or child

• A walk in fresh air with no phone

• Listening to music that moves you

• Writing down 3 things you’re grateful for

• Talking to someone who makes you laugh

• 10 minutes of silence or guided breathing

Notice what energises you personally, assuming what energises others will work for you can be useful - but ensure you become aware what uniquely energises you, we are all different in that regard.

Small deposits, done consistently, top up your reserves.

✅ Tip: Schedule deposits like meetings.

Otherwise they get squeezed out.

4. Design – Create Protective Boundaries

To maintain your battery, you need protection plans.

Design your days so you’re not constantly exposed to draining inputs.

Simple design examples:

• Set communication boundaries (e.g. “I won’t check email after 7pm”)

• Avoid emotional multitasking – one thing, one feeling at a time

• Use headphones as a visual cue that you’re not available

• Start your day before opening your phone

• Have one no-meeting day each week

This isn’t about escaping life – it’s about pacing it.

Bonus Insight: Stop Feeling Guilty for Needing Rest

One reason we stay emotionally depleted?

Guilt.

We believe:

• “I should be able to handle more”

• “Other people have it worse”

• “If I stop, I’ll fall behind”

The truth? You can’t pour from an empty cup.

When you refuel yourself, you show up better for everyone else too.

Rest is not the reward for hard work.

Rest is the foundation for sustained effort.

Summary

Emotional fatigue creeps in quietly, then takes over loudly.
To stay emotionally well, you need more than sleep. You need systems that protect your energy, and regular deposits that renew your spirit.

Quick Recap:
• Emotional fatigue is real, valid, and often invisible
• Use the Emotional Battery Model to recover:

• Deplete – Spot what’s draining you

• Disrupt – Change just one draining habit

• Deposit – Schedule small, meaningful recharges

• Design – Create boundaries that protect your energy
  • Rest is not indulgent – it’s intelligent

See you next week. One more thought 👇

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That's it for this week. Thanks for reading, really hope this helped. Contact me if you think I can help you further at [email protected].

Happy thinking.